Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Alfonso and the Heiress- or, Forbidden Love

I wrote this a while ago...when I was tired of writing, and decided to write the stupidest thing I could imagine. I think it turned out kind of funny.

Alfonso placed one hand on the girl’s creamy face, feeling the softness of her skin. He kept the other on the curve of her back. He knew she might not let him touch her ever again after he gave her his news.

“I don’t know how to tell you this, Anna,” he faltered, unable to meet her clear blue gaze, “but I’m the father of that child.”

“Alfonso! No!” exclaimed Anna, pulling herself from his grasp in horror, but unable to move too far away from his tempting warmth.

“There’s more,” Alfonso continued. “I also slept with your sister.”

“But…” Anna vainly tried to understand what he was telling her. As disbelief flooded her heart, it was becoming easier and easier to move away from his suddenly not-so desirable body.

“And…I ran over your cat with my car.”

“Mrs. Snuggles?! But that cat helped raise me before I found my biological mother!”

“I know…and if you can never forgive me, I will understand, but let me just say one more thing.” Alfonso pled his case, knowing that if she didn’t forgive him for his many sins, he would never know true love again.

“Don’t you think you’ve said enough?” gasped Anna weakly.

“I told you all this, all my secrets, knowing that you would never forgive me, for one reason, one all-consuming, all-important reason! Will you listen, Anna? If you don’t, I fear I will dash my lean Cuban body off the cliffs of Madrid where we first met.”

“Okay, okay,” responded Anna. “What’s the reason?”

“I have told you all this because… because…”

“Yes, Alfonso?”


“I’m listening, Alfonso!”


“Get to the point!”

“Of course darling, it’s because I Love You!”

Anna gasped in shock. Alfonso loved her? But she was only an inexperienced, slender, clear-skinned 18-year old heiress. She had never expected a cosmopolitan man like the dashing Alfonso to love her.

“You love me?” Exclaimed Anna before she even thought about her response. “That forgives everything!” She opened her arms to Alfonso. He ran to her.

“Oh, Anna!”

“Oh, Alfonso!”

“Oh Anna!”

“Oh, Alfonso!”

“We are going to be so happy together,” said Alfonso.

“Yes, Darling,” replied Anna, “We will live happily, happily ever after.”


  1. Hi Visiting from India. Good writing. You have a natural skill of writing. Keep it up and all the best.

  2. This is absolutely f-king hilarious! What state do you live in? I'm trying to get a literary arts publication started and I might solicit you for some submissions!

  3. Thanks, Christina- I am a big fan of your work on your blog. I live in sunny california, but I would love to work with you.

    And thank you pdkamath, for your encouragement.

  4. Now that's what I'm talking about! True love! :)

    I enjoyed this very much and hope to hear more of these star crossed lovers hehehe..

  5. Thank you! I'm honored that you've been reading! I thought I was following you, but realized yesterday that I was not. I remedied that real quick :)

    We are going to start off just doing our region and state, but I expect to ask for submissions from other states in the future, and when I do so, I'm definitely going to contact you :)

  6. So funny! And awfully close to what real romance novels are like, which is why it is so good :)

    My first unpublished novel (ha ha, I have several, I think I collect them really - but am still plugging away) was a romance novel and I cannot even tell you how lousy it was. Is.

    But not in a funny clever way like your tale of Anna and Alfonso!

  7. If this is what romance novels are like I have been missing something fantastic. This was hilarious!

  8. This totally reminds me of a piece I wrote in college... for a satire class. Beautifully done! (Mrs. Snuggles. OMG. I'm howling!)

  9. Sandy, I needed this laugh. love Mamasita

  10. Sandy, what a hoot! You're the best.

  11. That was so funny...i wish you had written an entire story..sometimes the Romantic stuff we get is so very same-ish...how refreshing to get one that is full of humour and sarcastic wit, yet still holding on to the style of the true romance gendre..Loved it !!

  12. hahah now that was different indeed!
    keep on writing